HOW TO MOVE ON FROM YOUR EX: ASAP
Uncommon tips that help when you’re done crying but still not free
Let’s be real: getting over an ex isn’t just about time. It’s about what you do with that time. You can cry for three months straight and still feel like you’re in day one. Or you can start showing up for yourself in new ways, and one day, quietly, you’ll realise: I’m actually okay.
Here’s the truth I wish more people said out loud: healing doesn’t start in your heart. It starts in your habits.
1. Cut contact and give it a purpose
You've heard it before: Go no contact.
But here’s the deeper truth, it’s not just to “get over them.” It’s to get back to you.
Every time you check their story, reread old texts, or casually send that “hope you’re well” message, you're interrupting your own healing timeline. Set a time limit for how long you’ll allow your mind to talk about him, 10 minutes a day if you need to process, then cut it off. Redirect your thoughts like you’re training a puppy: gentle, but firm.
2. Do new things you would never have done with him
Go to the art gallery he would’ve found boring. Hike at sunrise if he always slept in. Start a running group, dye your hair, wear that outfit he didn’t like. (Personally I shaved my head and he hated it so much. I friggen loved it!!!)
This isn’t about rebellion, it’s about reclaiming your taste, your time, and your identity. Every new action tells your brain: “We’re not in that relationship anymore. We’re in this life now.” Eventually, your emotions catch up.
3. Have a personal project that’s just yours
There’s something about building something new that re-centers your power. Whether it's a side hustle, a fitness goal, redecorating your space, or learning how to cook, it gives you a tangible win that has nothing to do with him.
You’ll stop needing closure when you’re too busy growing into someone he wouldn’t even recognise.
4. Give your brain a new addiction
When we miss an ex, we’re often missing dopamine. That rush of validation, attention, and connection.
Here’s the uncommon tip: give your brain something else to obsess over.
Try:
Learning a language on Duolingo
Running a 5k, 10k, half mara or full mara and tracking your progress.
Growing a balcony garden (full of little fruits/veggies, they’re so cute!)
Organising your finances and hitting a savings goal
These become your new highs, and they’re way more sustainable.
5. Talk about him less, live more
Set boundaries with your friends and yourself. Give yourself a timeline:
“This month I’m allowed to cry and vent. Next month, I’m replacing every convo about him with something I’m doing for myself.”
Because eventually, retelling the same story doesn’t help. It reopens wounds that your body is begging to heal.
6. Change your routine, change your brain
Your body remembers everything, the late night calls, the playlist you shared, the street you walked hand-in-hand.
But if you keep living the same way, your brain will think you’re still waiting for him to come back.
Change your routine. Wake up earlier. Rearrange your room. Try new places. Meet new people. Find new hobbies! I wrote a blog about this if you want to read about it.!
New habits tell your brain: We’ve moved on. Even when your heart still aches, your body starts leading the way.
7. Let it be both sad and exciting
Moving on isn’t a straight line. Some days you’ll miss him deeply, and other days you’ll feel light again. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re human.
You’re allowed to grieve and grow. You’re allowed to miss him and know he’s not your person. You’re allowed to hurt and STILL choose yourself. Don’t let loneliness pick your accompanion!
Final Note:
You’re not starting over.
You’re starting forward.
And the version of you that comes out of this? She’s going to be wiser, more whole, and no longer waiting to be chosen, because she’s choosing herself, every damn day.
Bonus tip:
This might sound petty, but it works like therapy. Write everything, the way he never fully listened, how he talked over you in group settings, how he made you feel like you had to shrink. Write how you cried waiting for a text, how he was emotionally unavailable, how he only showed up when it was convenient.
Get it out of your head and onto paper. This list becomes your anchor for those moments you forget why it ended. It brings logic into an emotional spiral and that alone can be a game changer. It did this both on paper and voice memo’d myself! It helps you realise that you dont’t want to be loved like that for the rest of your life!
Goodluck,
Lots of love,
Your girl, Liz.